Fat Guy
In every woman’s life, there is a time when she dates a fat guy. Not a morbidly obese, 800 lb. “i’m on TLC network programming” kind of guy necessarily, but i think deep down all women want to prove they aren’t superficial. So in an attempt to prove they “love the person, not the image” we all find a fatty to date for a bit. In your case, I just managed to prove that i can grow to dislike a fat guy just as much as sexy in-shape men.
Why the hell did you CRY so much? Like, you are a big dude. You work as a bouncer at clubs. GROW A PAIR and stop sniveling. I guess you think you can be all “sensitive” and shit since you are so physically enomous, but honestly it got really annoying listening to you sing Damien Rice songs. Emo+Fatso=Lame-o
I almost didn’t want to tell you we were over, just to avoid the excessive crying, but figured you would literally keep calling until i gave you formal walking papers. Thanks though for helping me move… on occasion a big guy comes in handy.
xo
That’s right, every guy who reads this: You are probably the fattest, ugliest guy your girlfriend has ever been with, and she’s only with you out of her fear of being alone and willingness to settle. And every time she looks at you shirtless or feels your man-tits pressing against her with smothering force, she’s just repeating over and over again, “He drives a 3-series, he drives a 3-series….”
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