Letter to My Exes

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The Exaggerator

October31

Hi there, Exaggerator. I wanted to drop you and note and find out what the hell you are saying to other people?!?!?!?! We met for coffee ONCE, and you were twenty minutes late. I had already almost finished my beverage, which i purchased using my own pocketbook. Granted we did sit for an hour and chat, but at no time did we make any sort of physical contact. And this interaction occurred at 11 am. I think claiming that we dated and it “didn’t work out” is a bit of an stretch of the imagination. But I’m flattered that you want other people to think we “dated,” since you were both the one interested in going out a second time, and then also the one that decided that you didn’t want to go out a second time.

Is your divorce final yet?

xo

posted under 1-3 dates

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